How to make a lady fall in love with you

How To Make a Lady Fall in love with You: Four Things You Must Do

How To Make a Lady Fall in love with You

The strategies on ‘how to make a lady fall in love with you,’ should ONLY be used on ladies you have true feelings for. And ladies you wish to have a meaningful thing with. And not on ladies you just want casual stuff with.

Okay, let’s begin—go grab a popcorn because this might be long.


The Best type of Relationship for a Man

From experience, the best relationship a man could have—where he has maximum respect and love from his woman is when he is the leader in the relationship and the woman is the follower.

In other words, a man has maximum respect in his relationship when his woman is more emotionally involved in the relationship than him. The truth is it’s in women’s nature to follow men in a relationship. They play the supporting role to men. Don’t mind these feminists.

Since it’s a relation-SHIP, there should be a captain who should navigate and call shots in that relation-SHIP. And that captain should be YOU. It can’t be both of you because you already know that, “Two Captains cannot be in one ship.”


The Emotion of Love goes Hand in Hand with the feeling of Not being in Control

Like I said in the post titled, “Are you a leader or follower in your relationship?” The emotion of being in love is biochemically linked to the feeling of being out of control.

Human beings tend to fall in love with people we FEEL we don’t have total control over. Therefore, the way to make a lady fall in love with you is to give her the feeling that she’s not in total control of you.

On the other hand, once you give any lady the feeling that she has total control over you. That is, she owns you completely and you’re willing to do whatever she asks you, whenever she asks you of it. Her respect and attraction for you immediately starts fading.

She starts falling out of love with you. This is just the bitter fact.

Secrets to make a lady fall in love with you: Make her feel Not in Control

So let’s say you met this amazing lady you have feelings for, and she also has feelings for you. Hence, the wooing was relatively simple—you didn’t chase.

So sparks are now flying— you two take it to another level—maybe after you two made out or after a night of great passion—whichever one. The thing is, you two know that you’re in a relationship.

Now for you to convert that her feelings into love. You have to make her fall in love with you—don’t leave it to chance.
So how can you do this? By making her feel not in control.

You can make a lady feel out of control by applying the following techniques:

1) Don’t Be Needy or Clingy: First tip on how to make a lady fall in love with you

This is where most guys lose their control in the relationship. Once you meet someone and you two connect emotionally—you both enter the honeymoon period.

This period is where all you want to do is to call her, spend time together with her, text her. You have that feeling that she’s the one who you’ll spend forever with.

This is your emotions driving you bro. And you’ve to apply self-discipline and control your emotions. So don’t call her like 5 times a day, or be texting with her non-stop or start spending every of your free time with her.

Women’s nature is a bit confusing. True, they love attention, but once you give them that attention too much, they start taking it for granted.

So what you should do is to mirror her interest and subtract from it. This means that: if she normally replies your text every 2 hrs, reply hers like 4 hrs or 6 hrs later. Just mix it up, so that she won’t notice a pattern.

If she calls you two times a day, call her like once in two days.
The thing is, never be the one who texts or calls a lady more—whether she’s introverted or not.

The fact is:

The more introverted a lady is, the more she’s going to bug your life sef, because she got time since she doesn’t like socializing with a lot of people.

Personally, when I meet any lady I let them know that one of my flaws is that I don’t call or text people often. I do that to kill any expectations they have of me of calling or texting often.

Naturally, if you’re a busy man, you won’t have time to be calling or texting a lady every time. So if you’re less busy— find something productive to engage yourself in. Texting and calling girls every time won’t bring money to your account.

Focus on the goals bro!

However, make sure the little time you spend with her is worth it for her. Make her feel so good and loved.


How to make a lady fall in love with you


2) Do for her what she needs and not what she asks: Second Tip on how to make a lady fall in love with you

If you do everything a lady asks of you, she would have the feeling that she got you completely under control. Then she starts falling out of love with you.

That’s why you see some guys saying, “I gave her everything she asked me for, and she still left me. Women are so confused and ungrateful!”

Now, this doesn’t mean you shouldn’t do anything for your woman. No, you should. However, you have to do for your girl what she NEEDS, and that’s what being a gentleman is.

For Instance:

If she’s still with her parents or she’s working and she asks you to subscribe for her. She doesn’t need it, because she can subscribe for herself.

However, if her laptop is malfunctioning and you know she really needs it—maybe for her school work or another important thing and you know she doesn’t have the finances to repair it at that moment. Then you could help her and repair it for her.

She doesn’t need you to buy her gifts every day, but you could get her some fruits and vegetable when she’s entertaining her monthly visitor. You know they lose a lot of blood that period. That’s being considerate.

Or maybe she called you on phone and asked you if you got a minute, she wants to talk to you. If you’re really busy, you could tell her that you can’t talk with her in a polite way:

You: Hun, I’m really busy. And if you talk to me now, I won’t give you 100% of my attention which you deserve as always. However, when I’m through with what I’m doing, I’ll call you and you could tell me everything you wanted to tell me… and by then you’ll have my undivided attention. Okay?

So, you don’t necessarily have to give your woman a listening ear whenever she wants it. But don’t dismiss her rudely.

For instance:

You: I’m busy… I don’t have time now [In a harsh tone].

Don’t do that bro.

You have to realize that one of the main needs of a woman is CHALLENGE. They want a man who is a bit of a challenge to them. And if you do everything she asks, you’re depriving her of that challenge and she starts falling out of love with you.

Hence to make a lady fall in love with you, you MUST give her some challenge. Don’t make it too easy for her.

So if your woman does a birthday shout out for a guy, and she says, “This big head can disturb for Africa, he is very stubborn…” Hmmm, bro watch out for that dude. Hahaha


3) Be Unpredictable: Third Tip on How to Make a Lady fall in Love with You

Always mix up your patterns. Always keep her guessing your next move. Don’t be an open book that she could read and understand easily.

Surprise her from time to time. Ladies get easily bored, so whenever they start predicting you, they start falling out of love with you.

On the other hand, if you keep a lady guessing, you’ll make a lady fall in love with you.

Like I mentioned earlier, you could get her fruits during her time in the month. However, if you do that often it loses its charm. So it’s better you just do it randomly and not on every month.

Please, don’t listen to these other dating tips who tell you to send your woman good morning and good night Sms every day. It kills the relationship’s vibe.

However, you could just send her a goodnight or morning Sms randomly—out of the blue. It will boost her attraction for you like mad. I suggest you do this when she did something you liked—maybe she cooked a nice meal for you or bought you a gift.

This act will encourage her to do more similar things for you. Since you liked it and sent a good morning text which you’ve never done before or don’t do often. This rewarding technique is known as Operant Conditioning.

Another way you can be unpredictable is by mixing up your date time. Maybe she spent the night at your place, and the following morning you tell her to get dressed in a casual wear and then you take her on a date in the morning time instead of the evening time she’s used to.

That’s being unpredictable. Get a girl guessing and she’ll feel totally out of control and in love with you.


4) Get Her to Invest in You: Fourth Tip on How to Make a lady Fall in Love with you

I’ll keep on saying this until every cell in my body stops functioning:

“You don’t make a lady fall in love with you by investing on her—instead you make her fall in love with you by getting her to invest in you.”

According to the research carried out by Horan and Booth-Butterfield in 2010, “A giver feels more committed to the recipient of their giving.” In simpler words, the more a lady invests you in the more she feels committed to you.

And this one of the reasons most nice guys are frustrated. They ask themselves, “How would a lady leave them—who is willing to bring down the whole world, for a man who doesn’t spend a thing on her. Instead she’s the one even doing the spending.”


How to make a lady fall in love with you

So how can you get a woman to invest in you?

You can get a woman to start investing in you immediately you meet her by getting her to talk about herself more.

For Instance:

You: So what course are you studying?

Her: Banking and Finance.

You: Is that the course you’ve always wanted to do since you were a kid?

Her: No, I actually wanted to study Theatre Arts.

You: So why aren’t you studying it?

Her: My dad didn’t like the course. So I had to change it so that peace would reign.

You: That’s African parents for you. So how do you feel when you see someone studying Theatre Arts?

Her: Truth is, I really feel awful… I’ll always support my kids in any career they choose. I don’t want them to feel this way.

So now, you already know that this girl is studying Banking and Finance but she really wanted to study Theatre Arts.

But because of her dad didn’t like the course she had to let go and she feels really bad about that. What does she know about you? Nothing much.
That means she’s already investing more in you. Good job!

Don’t be scared to ask Her for Favours

You could also ask her for small favors. Ask her to bring you the food she cooked to your house instead of taking her out on a date every time. You ask her to cook for you, or take you out on a date that you’re broke, and so on.

Make sure to reward her whenever she invests in you. You can do this by increasing the level of attention you give to her. Maybe she bought you a nice birthday gift, you could reward that investment by increasing the number of times you call her or spend time with her.



To make a lady fall in love with you, you have to give her feeling of being out of control.

You can do this by being a bit elusive and not being clingy towards her; doing what she needs and not everything she asks of you; also by keeping her guessing and getting her to invest in you.

Remember, don’t apply this strategy on ladies you don’t want a serious thing with. Don’t hurt or lead girls on.


Cheers to an amazing love life,

About the Author: Gerald Dike

Gerald Dike is the founder of Relationship Strategies For Men. He has helped thousands of men have better interactions and healthy relationships with women of their dreams. He is also an entrepreneur in one of the biggest countries in Africa.

You can grab his new Book here==> The Attractive Man: How to Become the Man Who Women Desire And Chase

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Posted in Article, Relationship Tips.


  1. I was honestly doing the opposite of what you have written and this has put my relationship in turmoil. I will read this article again and again and again until it sticks to my brain cells.Thanks bro

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