Understanding women

Understanding Women 101: Two Things You must know

Understanding Women

Most men have given up the hope of understanding women. A woman will tell you that she wants this, but you see her going for the opposite thing.

You would see a lady lamenting, “Ohh! Why can’t I find a nice guy?” But the same lady friend-zoned that her nice polite male friend who is willing to bring down the world for her.

You often hear ladies say, “They love men who are romantic.” But several times you have met a new girl and showed her you’re romantic by buying her gifts, taking her to expensive romantic first dates, sending her morning and night texts, and so on… but she ended up taking you for granted or exploiting you.

“Ahh! Confused set of human beings!” Most men usually cry in frustration.

But after reading  this post, you will understand the basic systematic of the female mind.

understanding women


Generally, human beings are emotional beings. However women in particular are more emotionally driven than men. Hence, they speak emotions and cover it with logic. However men interpret things more logically.

For Instance.

A man might say, “Okay, you can go ahead.” And what he really means is that you can go ahead.

But when a woman tells you, “Okay, you can go ahead.” Most times it’s a trap or a dare.

The frustration comes when you try to understand what women say logically, instead of emotionally.

In understanding women, the first thing you have to do is to decode whatever they say emotionally and not logically.


Statement: “Ohh! Why can’t I find a nice guy?” A lady asks.

What a regular guy thinks she means: She needs a polite man who will treat her like a queen or goddess. Who will take it slow with her and do for her everything she asks of him.

What she actually means: Ohh! Why can’t I find a confident, seductive, and attractive man, who will sweep me off my feet, but has a GOOD heart? A dominant man who would genuinely care about how I feel and my emotions, and not a player. When she said ‘nice,’ she never meant a supplicating guy who would place her on a pedestal and treat like a goddess.



Statement: “Women love men who are romantic,” most ladies say.

What a regular guy thinks it means: Women love men who spends so much time and cash on them, buying gifts and taking them to expensive restaurants.

What it really means: Women love seductive men who are capable of connecting emotionally with them. Men who are capable of exciting those erotic and romantic feelings in them— by the way they act around them, the way they talk so seductively to them, and the words they say to them.

When women say this, what they seek is that passionate romance portrayed in most romantic novels, which they have been feeding their mind since they were teenagers.

And they definitely do not see buying of gifts and spending too much on them immediately you meet them as being romantic.


Understanding women


Another thing you have to know about ladies which would help you in understanding women is that they’re very good in concealing their true intentions. In other words, they don’t usually blatantly tell you what they want from you. Especially when it comes to showing you interest; that they like you.

Why? Because they don’t want to lose value in your eyes or in the eyes of the society— in case you didn’t act on it. Rejection gets to girls more than it does to guys. This is probably because they are usually the ones who are meant to be chased and shown interest to, so when they now show you interest and you don’t act on it or you reject them— it pains them greatly.

Hence, when girls show you interest, they do it so implicitly, so that they could always claim they were not serious— that is, if you don’t capitalize on it.



Scenario: You and a lady were chatting and it was really going well; and she suddenly says that you two would make a good couple. Then immediately she laughs and says, “Hahaha, this one is happy, you and who? Big head like you.”

Analysis: She really meant what she said initially.  She already likes you and thinks you two would make a lovely couple. So ignore the sarcasm in the end, and start escalating things with her by flirting more with her.



Scenario: You met a girl newly and you two are having a conversation, and she was paying so much attention to you–contributing more to the conversation. Then suddenly she starts acting aloof or distracted.

Analysis: Ignore her acting of not being interested, and still ask her for her contact or invite her home— whichever you had intentions of doing when you initiated the conversation with her.

According to Chase Amante, the rule is:

“If a woman implies she is interested in you, you should accept the statement as a sign of interest and ignore sarcasm, aloofness, or feigned distraction as simply her efforts to protect her reputation in the event you do not feel the same or do not take action to lead her to a satisfactory conclusion.”


Scenario: A girl you are still trying to court or woo suddenly tells you she would be traveling soon.

Analysis: She didn’t tell you she was traveling because she just wanted you to know, or wanted you to give up hope on her. No, she told you that because she likes you, and probably wants to see you and escalate things before she travels. That travel mention is a sign of urgency— that you need to move faster.



Scenario: You’re on a date with a lady, and it’s really going well, and she suddenly tells you she is feeling sleepy or she’s tired.

Analysis: She does not mean she wants to go home and sleep. If she was really feeling sleepy or tired and wants to go home. She would tell you she has somewhere important to be, or an errand to run. Most times, when a girl tells you “I’m feeling sleepy or tired,” especially when the date is going so well. It means she wants you to take her to YOUR home, or somewhere you two can stay alone.

So next time you hear that, invite her home!

For instance:

Her: I’m feeling sleepy (in a low and babyish manner)

You: Okay, let’s head to my place then.

Her: Why your place?

You: Because my bed is more comfortable than yours. Come let’s go! (you say this with sarcasm while standing up and motioning her to do so as well).



Scenario: When a lady asks you ‘if your house is far?’ or ‘whether you stay alone or have roommates’

Analysis: She is indirectly asking you if you have somewhere you two could stay alone together and have some quality time.



To understand women you have to sieve everything they say, and try to decode the emotions and true intentions behind it. Always pay attention to a girl’s body language and actions, it gives you a better hint to what she really wants; that’s the secret to understanding women.


I hope you enjoyed the lecture 101 and 102 in understanding women? Good! You’re now promoted to 201.



Your friend,


If you would want to learn more about understanding women, read these two blog posts:

Girls usually Hide their True Intentions with Ambiguity.

What to Answer when a Girl asks you, Do you have a Girlfriend?



About the Author: Gerald Dike

Gerald Dike is the founder of Relationship Strategies For Men. He has helped thousands of men have better interactions and healthy relationships with women of their dreams. He is also an entrepreneur in one of the biggest countries in Africa.

You can grab his new Book here==> The Attractive Man: How to Become the Man Who Women Desire And Chase

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