single ladies are not single

Single Ladies are not actually Single: See why here

Single ladies are not actually Single

A lot of guys are so concerned with a girl’s relationship status — whether she is single, before they approach or ask her out on a date. They want to be certain that she does not have a boyfriend before they start wooing her.

The truth is from the age of 14 or even less, an average girl already has at least one guy who is performing the roles of a boyfriend to her. One of the problems most men have is that we tend to see ladies’ romantic life from our own eyes.

A guy might be 21 yrs of age and is totally single. That is, he has absolutely no woman in his romantic life. However, it is nearly impossible for a lady of the same age to have no man in her romantic life.

Most times, the girl who tells you that she’s single is not into any of the men in her romantic life, or she sees you are a more valuable or an attractive man than any of the men in her life. And not that she has no man in her life. Always remember this.

single ladies

Displacement Value

When a lady becomes your girlfriend, and you become her main boyfriend, just have in mind there’s a guy you have displaced to take up his position. Yes! It’s an unfair world out there. Most of us have been displaced at least once from our relationship. I still remember the first time I was displaced. It was in my senior secondary. I was displaced by a university guy— actually a year one guy. Ahaha!

In Chemistry, we were taught about electro-chemical series. The metals in the top of the electro-chemical series will easily displace metals lower in the series from their compounds. However, it would be difficult for a metal to displace another metal which is just below it in the series.

For the non-science inclined people, I’m sorry for the little confusion.

So, this is the same in attraction. The more attractive and valuable you are as a man, the easier it would be for you to displace other men of lower attractiveness and lower value.

For Instance:

It will be relatively easy for me to displace a year one guy from a relationship with his year one girlfriend. On the other hand, it will be difficult for me to displace a fellow bachelor of similar attractiveness and value with me from his relationship with his girlfriend.

What does this mean for you?

This simply means you should stop focusing on whether a lady has a boyfriend or not before approaching or toasting her. Instead, focus on becoming a very attractive man. A man who would be able to displace her from any relationship she is currently in.

How to become an Attractive man

single ladies

If you wish to become more attractive to women, you’ve to work on yourself. Some of the areas you should focus on include:

  • Your dress sense.
  • Grooming: your hairstyle, facial hairs.
  • Your body physique: shred some body fats.
  • Learn how to make strong and sexy eye contact with ladies.
  • Improve your body language: how you act around ladies.
  • Become a good conversationalist: someone who knows how to start, hold conversations with women. A man who knows how to connect emotionally with ladies quickly through conversations; someone who knows the right questions to ask ladies to get them open up and reveal their true self.
  • Improve your smoothness when dealing with women.
  • Understand how to lead women and get them to start investing in you.
  • Improve your seduction skills. Learn how to flirt and seduce ladies.
  • Develop the courage to move fast with ladies: start asking ladies out to first dates quickly, going for the first kiss quickly – preferably on first dates, inviting ladies to your apartment immediately.

Don’t ask her if she’s in a relationship

I can’t remember the last time I asked a lady if she was in a relationship. It has been quite long. My pattern is this:

Any lady I’m attracted to, I approach her immediately, if the approach is a successful one, I get her contact, and set up a first date ASAP. On the first date, the first thing I’ll be focused on will be to create an emotional connection with her— to find out who she really is, and not the person she’s portraying to be.

Once I connect with her emotionally, that is, she knows that I understand who she really is and accept her without being judgmental of her life decisions and choices so far, she now has that feeling that we’ve known each other for ages even though we just met few days ago.

Then I initiate the seduction process. I start flirting with her more directly. I touch her more without reason, giving her lingering eye contact during silent moments, I start hitting her with more sexual humors. Then I go for the kiss or I try to invite her home.

But I will definitely not ask her if she has a boyfriend during the date. Even if she asks me about my relationship status, I’ll answer her but I won’t throw back the question to her.

From experience, I have found out that if a lady is in a relationship she values and considers a serious one. She’ll always find a way to tell you on the date without you asking. And when a lady tells me she’s in a relationship, I don’t try to inquire more about the relationship like most nice guys do. Instead I change the topic quickly, and still try moving fast with her to know if she really means it or she was just testing me to know if I would bail or try harder for her. Most times, it’s usually the latter— they were just testing me.

However, if it’s the former, then her intention is to friend zone me or keep in the waiting zone. So I bail, and cut contact with the lady immediately. I sincerely have no time to waste on unserious ladies. I have a lot of goals to achieve in this my short life on earth.


No lady is actually single.  So don’t bother about that when approaching or wooing women, unless you have a personal relationship with the boyfriend, maybe he is a close friend of yours, so respect the bro code, and let the lady go.

So when you meet a lady, just focus on projecting yourself right to her, then allow her to decide if she would be single or not for you. And if you do your job well, most ladies you meet will be single for you.

The more attractive you become the easier it will be for you to make girls leave their relationships for you. And the harder it will be for other guys to displace you from your relationship.
At the end, you’ve to realize that a lady is either married or single. So until they are married, they’ll always look to be with and date the next big thing they could get their hands on. That’s just the bitter truth bro. Don’t complain or whine about it, rather, focus on always being the next big thing.

Bye for now,


About the Author: Gerald Dike

Gerald Dike is the founder of Relationship Strategies For Men. He has helped thousands of men have better interactions and healthy relationships with women of their dreams. He is also an entrepreneur in one of the biggest countries in Africa.

You can grab his new Book here==> The Attractive Man: How to Become the Man Who Women Desire And Chase

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Posted in Article, Getting women.

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