how to get a girlfriend easily

How to Get a Girlfriend Effortlessly

How to Get a Girlfriend Effortlessly

“Will you be my girlfriend?” “I want you to be my girlfriend.”

I still remember when I used these kind of statements on girls I wanted to date. Most times, their responses were not encouraging. I normally got replies like this;

“Okay I’ve heard you.”

“Really, are you serious?”  (In a sarcastic tone)

“Give me some time, let me think about it.” (And as you know most times, that ‘sometime’ means ‘forever’)

Sometimes, the reply will come as a question;

Why do you want me as a girlfriend?”

As you can see this question puts the pressure on me. Then I’ll start spitting all the rubbish lines I learnt from romantic movies.

However, during the early period of my journey towards understanding women; I realized that girls don’t want to date men who chase them, rather they love men who they chase.

And whenever I asked girls “Would you be my girlfriend?” I was chasing them. Then they start running by forming for me. I knew I had to stop chasing them. But most importantly give them a bait, so they would start chasing me.

And that’s what I’ll reveal to you today.


Now, the mistake I see most men make is that they treat that girl they want as a girlfriend differently from the ones they want a causal relationship with.

They happen to take risks and move fast with ladies they want a causal relationship with, but become timid, play it safe and move so slow with that girl they want as a girlfriend.

Listen to me bro, the easiest way to lose a girl is to move slow and avoid taking risks with her.

Personally, I treat every new girl I like the same. Whether you’re the prettiest girl in town or the most innocent and decent looking girl in the area.

I always move fast with girls. I don’t place any girl on pedestals, because I know that’s not how to get a girlfriend, rather it’s the easiest way to get friend zoned

How to get a girlfriend effortlessly

Make Your Intentions Clear From The First Date

So, on the first date I flirt with the girl, indicating I’m much sexually and romantically interested in her. I don’t pretend to be a monk when I’m with her.

For instance, a girl once complained to me on our first date when the waiter was wasting a bit of time with our order;

“This restaurant is so slow ehh”

Then I gave her a sexy stare, with a bit of a mischievous smile and I said using a bedroom kinda voice;

“So you like ‘it’ fast? I thought ladies always loved it slow.”

Hahaha… OMG! Gerald, your mind is so dirty,” she replied.

Trust me bro, 99.9% of ladies love a guy with a dirty mind.

This type of flirting is called sexual humor. Now, this doesn’t mean you should be vulgar.  There are other ways you can flirt with girls, such as eye contact, touching, teasing, and so on…

So back to what I was saying…

I move fast with every lady, show my interest in her, and I always try to invite them to my apartment on the first date–if the vibe is right. EVERY lady. No exceptions!!!

Most ladies decide on what category to fix you in after the first date. Whether you’re a friend, lover or boyfriend material. So always make your intentions clear from the first date with every lady.

Also Read: Four Categories Women Slot the Men in their life


Now if you see a lady, and you would want her to be your girlfriend. Approach her,  move fast with her, ask her out on a date,  take risks with her, and don’t be scared you might lose her.

And if she doesn’t respond positively, don’t chase her. It just means she’s not that into you. However, if she agrees to go out on a date with you. Then you use the first date strategies on her.

Read the first date strategies here

But pay attention to this;

“Don’t TELL her you want her as a girlfriend.”

However, SHOW her you’re in interested in her and that you’re single. How can you do this? I’ll tell you.

1. Create an emotional connection with her: This is the most important part in having success with women. If you can create an emotional connection with a woman, you’ve already gotten her 80%.

What is Emotional Connection?

This is the feeling you give a girl that you understand her; that you can relate to her and that you don’t judge her.

That same kind of feeling you’ve when you just met a stranger and it feels like you two have known each other for ages.

How can you create this connection with ladies? By knowing how to hold a conversation with a lady. Knowing how to get her to tell you things she only tells very close friends in a very short period of time.

You can do this by asking the right questions, and listening to her. I talked a little about it in first date strategies.

Now, this is the BAIT you give girls to start chasing you.

2. Let her know you’re not desperate to enter a relationship: When you tell a lady: “I want you to be my girlfriend on the first date.” It shows desperation, and girls don’t react too well to desperation.

Personally, if I want a girl as a girlfriend, on the first date I’ll chip in that

“I love the idea of being in a relationship someday, and that I really love seeing cute couples together. However, I can’t just rush into relationships—you know that sh*t is hard.”

This tells her that you’re a boyfriend material and you’re bit picky when it comes to people who you enter a relationship with. And you being picky means you’re valuable. Then she starts chasing you for a relationship.

However, if I don’t want a relationship, just a causal stuff—nothing serious. I’ll let her know that,

“I love my single life, and I don’t see myself in any relationship soon. I just want to give maximum attention to my goals. And moreover, life’s so short, so I’m trying to enjoy every moment of my life.”

This tells her I’m not a boyfriend material—I’m a bit wild. But, since I’m exciting these naughty feelings in her, I might be a worthy lover, and she’ll likely give me a try.

Now, this is what’s called Frame Control.

how to get a girlfriend


This is a very important strategy on how to get a girlfriend, so pay attention. When you’ve made a girl start chasing you for a relationship; you’ve to know when to accept her request before she gets frustrated and leave.

Here are some of the signs to know when a lady wants to have a relationship with you.


Maybe when you want to get physical intimate with her; you know do some boyfriend and girlfriend things with her, she might say something like this;

  • Wait, wait… what are we? What do you see me as?
  • Leave me alone… I’m not your girlfriend.
  • Please, don’t come near me oo, before all these your girlfriends pour me acid.

Now whenever you hear these kind of statements, it’s now time to seal the deal. You now assure her that she’s your girl.

For example


Her: Wait, wait… What are we? What do you see me as?

You: I’m the best thing to happen to your life, and you’re the best thing to happen to mine.

Or you could also say;

You: You’re my girl, and I’m your man.


Her: Leave me alone… I’m not your girlfriend.

You: How’s that possible when I’m your boyfriend? Are you already cheating on me Hun? (In a sarcastic tone)


Her: Please, don’t come near me oo, before all these your girlfriends pour me acid.

You: Then, they’ve to pour the acid on us together, because I’m not leaving your side.

Just be a little smooth with your reply.

Another way to know she wants you as a boyfriend is that; she might start getting jealous when she sees you with another female.

And when you notice such. Give her a kiss or do some other cute thing to her which is a bit romantic and tell her something sweet. Like;

You’ll make a lovely girlfriend. I hope you know that?

And brother, that’s how to get a girlfriend effortlessly in this 21st century.

Conclusion: How to Get a Girlfriend Effortlessly 

If you want a girl as a girlfriend. Move fast with her. Take risks with her (don’t be scared to go for the kiss on the first date—if you feel the mood is right).

Be charming and connect emotionally with her. Then let her know subtly in your conversation you’re single and ready to mingle, but you’re not desperate to enter one.

Then when she starts chasing you, seal the deal. And all these could be sealed in less down 14 days.

Cheers bro,


You can also join our private Facebook Group where men are free to express their relationship and love problems without judgement and get sincere advice from myself and other men.

Join the private group by clicking HERE (Remember to click the “join group” button)

About the Author: Gerald Dike

Gerald Dike is the founder of Relationship Strategies For Men. He has helped thousands of men have better interactions and healthy relationships with women of their dreams. He is also an entrepreneur in one of the biggest countries in Africa.

You can grab his new Book here==> The Attractive Man: How to Become the Man Who Women Desire And Chase

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